random blog epidemic

From Jenny's xanga:

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. What does it say?
"Detective open for now so you can refer to its settings."

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch?
a lime-green telephone

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Judge Mathis

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
3:00

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
2:42

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
refrigerator

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
I went to the library this morning.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
People's xanga's.

9. What are you wearing?
A green pladded button shirt over a t-shirt i got at a garage sale, a pair of work-wear gap jeans, a black leather belt, a cotton jacket with a fleece lining, and calvin klein underwear.

10. Did you dream last night?
the average person dreams 6 times per night. but i forget.

11. When did you last laugh?
last night while watching "Mr & Mrs Smith".

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
An oil painting of a big sail boat that my grandmother painted, an italian flag, a scenic picture of the mountains.

13. Seen anything weird lately?
Spikey "coconuts" at a Vietnamese grocery store.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
informative

15. What is the last film you saw?
Mr and Mrs Smith on DVD.
Syriana at the theatre.

In the theatre?
see above.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
new computers for refugee kids, retirement for my parents, and a new pair of shoes for me.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know.
when i learned how to tie a knot for my shoe laces in preschool i tied a girl's hair into a knot while she was sleeping in preschool because i could never fall asleep. i got in trouble for it.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
seriously, have everybody brush their tongue everyday on a mandatory basis.

19. Do you like to dance?
not really

20. George Bush:
should force the U.S. government to give back all the stolen lands back to the native americans.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
i'll think about this question together with my wife when we're ready.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
i dont know.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
yah.

24. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?
Welcome home, I've been waiting for you.

25. 4 people who must also do this quiz in THEIR journal:
i dont know

another death in the family

A couple of days ago my baby cousin died from inadvertent strangulation on his throat. it was the ropes from window blinds that taggled him. last i saw him and his twin brother and his older sister he was just beginning to get the hang of crawling around. so he was probably up and walking around when he got caught.

tie window-blind ropes and all possible loose ends. these are baby killers.

America's drug obsession.

sad story today. Americans take drugs to lose weight. now there is a news headlining report about the sleeping drug Ambien. according to researchers it is just now being discovered that this drug causes sleep-eating (eating in your sleep).

people would wake up with candy wrappers and crumbs all over the place, the kitchen is a mess, and they cut themselves while attempting to chop food. then they gain weight.

drugs drugs drugs. everywhere there's drugs. i have drugs. you have drugs. everywhere drugs.

a song by Starfield

i'm listening to this song All For you by Starfield. it's an awesome song with uplifting qualities. the chorus goes something like this....

it's all for you, it's all for you,
i'm letting go, i'm letting go,...

these lyrics makes me really think about things, like my status relative to God. but i'm hesitant to let go. how is it humanly possible to let it all go for the sake of a God that we can not see nor touch? i tell you it is not humanly possible. it requires a divine intervention. and what if some people are not ready to be affected by the divine? what if some people will never be ready? and what if some people are chosen by the divine to never be influenced (or saved) by that same divine power?

it is the darkness that draws us to the light. makes sense doesn't it? i've been painted on, lied to, and spat on. demons in hell must be dancing around knowing they've got me in the palms of their hand. you see, i should've wielded my sword and shield long ago when i saw the enemy frontlines on the horizon. but i've procrastinated. i've underestimated, as always. but in a final attempt in desperation i'm wielding my sword now. this is a spiritual war, and let me tell you, it is bloody.

going back to the book of Romans.

video: a closing piece.

this piece is for a church in Denton, TX and is designed to close the Sunday service. they're a conservative church, so they requested some a little, well, conservative. they've all the equipment necessary to display this. all they need to do is run it.

video: a peace legacy.

this small video never gets old.
i wouldn't mind making a new rendition of this for every single
Sunday's call-to-worship showing.

video: what if.

just a bunch of random questions.
the only surviving piece of NSD promotional stuff
that was created way back when.

video: afraid.

first video blog updated. still in experimental stage, so quality no good.

i doubt im the only one.

God being all-knowing and all-loving, does it make sense for Him to create creatures that are bound to fall? i dont get it. im not questioning God, but it's just that i dont get it. God is a jealous and selfish God, yet absolutely and utterly righteous, for He is incapable of being anything less than perfect. it is simply not in His nature to NOT be righteous. so why would He create a race that is destined to miss the mark (sin) from the very beginning because of their God-given free will? im assuming that many in our human race will not reach Him and that only a few will enter those heavenly gates. those who are rejected will suffer forever by the total absence of God. and those who are granted to be in His presence will experience joy beyond words, forever. it can be said that rewards and just being in the very presence of God is what will make it all clear, that it's a privileage to go through this fallen world and all it's griefs so that we can know that much more the rewards and the joys that awaits us, when we are walking in perfect communion with God, just like how it used to be in that garden, east of Eden.

I dont buy this any more. It's hard to accept this. It's difficult to believe that any of this is righteous. I personally think God was just bored and needed to entertain Himself. Take a person, any sane person, and place him into solitary confinement. It doesn't take too long before
his mind begins to wander. How much so must it be for God? I imagine it'd be immensely (infinitely?) so.

I'm not rejecting God, although it sounds like it. I'm saying that my understanding of the western take on Christ and God is theology and religion. These things, theology and religion, speaks to me as arrogant. Im pretty fed up with western ideology, as well as the west's superiority complex when it comes to just about anything and everything.

my experience at the beach

the boat was jam-packed with my fellow comrads, elbow to elbow, as we anxiously awaited for the inevitable when our boat would land and the door in front of us would open to the full onslaught. out of nowhere out boat capsized and i soon found myself under the sea as i watched my friends swim for the top. all sounds, though traveling faster, were eerily dampened by the cold water.

but then i broke the ocean surface gasping for air, and suddenly the true sounds of reality were again ringing in clear - all the zinging and clanging of bullets and mortar explosions unnaturally mixed in with the constant roaring of the ocean waves.

i crouched and hid my body behind a giant, metal jacks-like barracade. with the entire ocean behind me and the heavily fortified beach of Normandy before me, i couldn't move, i was too scared to storm the beach.

after about 30 seconds i gained my composure and reassured myself that this is only a video game...i can do this. i died many times before progressing beyond the beach of Normandy. and that was only the opening level of the game.

war is hell.

A dream

Last night i drempt a weird collage of so many things. It's strange how when i dream these big collage dreams it's made up of snippets from dreams that i've previously had.

Last night i hung out with a couple of friends; one of them i havent seen in over 3 years. We watched a movie.... i drank a beer, 1 beer, and i went to bed at midnight. that is a formula for collage dreaming my friend.

In my dreams I said goodbye to a friend and then I walked away. I didnt walk away because I wanted too... I did so because I was asked to.

gross, im eating a color!

what if instead of being named brocoli it's named green?
or what if instead of eggplant it's just purple?
and instead of raisins, poopy-brown?
that's the way i feel when i eat an orange.
i think, eww, i'm eating a color.

my middle school computer science teacher made a point to tell the class that i don't have black hair, that "only black people have black hair" and that i actually have dark brown hair. is this considered racist or just superfluous?

i saw a person use the restroom and not wash his hands afterwards.

a lady in front of me took most of the chicken, vegetables, and noodles from the cauldron of chicken-noodle soup. what an inconsiderate person i thought to myself.

i'm looking for a new pair of blue jeans.

my day dreamings are haunting me during the day.

i discovered the joys of cutting my own hair.

i found that im perfectly used to using a computer mouse with my left hand, yet it's nearly impossible for me to brush my teeth or use chop sticks or write my name left-handed.

i still really want a motorcycle, but my parents reiterated again, "over my dead body."

i've begun to write a novel.

pulp thoughts

wearing a zipped up black hooded jacket in a white collar corporate environment was not a smart thing. people nearly stop in their tracks when they first see you. that was one day. after that day i didnt dare wear the hood. wearing flip flops this past week got similar glances and 2nd takes. funny. they look at you and then your feet. corporate america. she's so uptight.

again, i find myself between the promises of wealth, happiness, a comfortable retirement - and new faces, new cultures, and new horizons. what to do...what to do...?

im thinking about trying out for an advanced diving license, which would open the doors to a vast array of other certifications: like marine archaeology, underwater photography, cave diving, and even dive navigation, and search & rescue. bottom line, i love diving. now im trying to find ways to incorporate my career into it, or out of it, or just change careers.

feeling good, better, in many ways. but still kicking myself for still being a moron.

unifying theory of everything

Disclaimer : the following thesis by no means in any good shape or modern fashion condones nor denies the truth and its intricacies of a self-proclaimed and seemingly self-absorbed and helplessly arrogant series of mathematical inductions to provide proof of a questionable thread of thought in the ethereal plane of the milky way galaxy and beyond. in addition, this document thesis does not claim to be the sole work or property or proprietary wisdom of that of Edward S. An.
-by edward

assign a 1-based consecutively increasing number for each letter of the alphabet, like so:

A = 1
B = 2
C = 3
D = 4
E = 5
F = 6
G = 7
H = 8
I = 9
J = 10
K = 11
L = 12
M = 13
N = 14
O = 15
P = 16
Q = 17
R = 18
S = 19
T = 20
U = 21
V = 22
W = 23
X = 24
Y = 25
Z = 26

then by the 2nd law of thermodynamics it follows that

(A + B + C) = (1 + 2 + 3)
and thusly, F = 6

following this strange phenomenon we can prove once and for all that hardwork does not always yield a greater result than something of a lesser moral value. for instance, consider the following:

(H + A + R + D + W + O + R + K) = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98
(S + T + U + D + Y) = 19+21+4+25 = 69
(B+U+L+L+S+H+I+T) = 103

but according to Einstein's law of E=MC^2 such phenomenon's are not likely to exist, although they are not entirely impossible to exist. if it were possible from a probabilistic point of view then the letters will merge together by moduluses of the prime numbers 3 or 7 or an imaginary number that is customarily denoted by the character §. this increasing complexity of the saturated universe can be elegantly explained however by the direct approach of quantum mechanics and the unorthodoxical administration and filibustering of the numbers for a few hours.

using this modern tool-set of quantum matrices in an outdated world as a means of resolving this strange and peculiar numbering phenomenon, we can make extractions to and fro the underlying realm of mathematics and the entire universe itself. the following is a sample of a unified formulaic approach to confirm just one of surely billion quillion frillions of held beliefs:

(E+D+D+I+E) = 27
based on the draconian laws of the hybrid rubberband effect, we can reverse the digits 2 and 7 so that it becomes 7 and 2 (note that this may cause some adverse side effects).
now we have a nice wholesome value of 72.
using a combination of elementary nuclear physics and classical newtonians physics, we can conclude that 9 * 8 = 72.
observe that 9 * 8 can also be described as I * H.
once again we can apply the draconian laws of the hybrid rubberband effect to give us H * I, or simply HI, which when converted to english notation is quite elegantly "hi".
now, using fuzzy math, adjust this fritional coefficient to be approx 0.1 which will give us a value of 75 (or just add 3 to 72).
finally add 1 to the result if it's leap year.
the result should be either 75 or 76.

if result is 75:
it naturally follows that (7+5+14+9+21+19) = 75
then, it becomes painfully obvious that 75 = (G+E+N+I+U+S)
the result in modern english is the string of characters, "genius"

if result is 76:
it naturally follows that (7+5+14+9+21+19) + 1 = 75 + 1
then, it becomes painfully obvious that 75 = (G+E+N+I+U+S) + A, or A + (G+E+N+I+U+S)
the result in modern english is the string of characters, "a genius"
note that there is a character-space between 'a' and 'g'. this is automatically inserted due to the natural governing law of gravity, or the illusion thereof. this quintessentially proves that this character-space is simply an illusion and is not really there.

unfortunately the sum of the letters in the string of characters "eddie" has expired. eddie is now 28 years old. 27 years he was last year. so the above proof no longer holds true.
however, this formula did confirm exactly one year ago that Eddie's long held belief ever since he was in diapers held to be true last year when he was 27.

the expired conclusion: Eddie was a genius at 27.

this is a significant finding since there are only 26 letters of the known alphabet. the numerical value 27, with respect to the 26-letter alphabet dynamic, has not exceeded its range as one might initially presume. instead, 27 is equivalent to 1 (a.k.a. A). this can only be explained by the elegance of quantum distribution which allows the wrapping (looping) of letter-value pairs.
thus, the actual conclusion is that Eddie was a genius at 1 AND at 27. so it can be predicted that the next cycle of Eddie's geniusness will begin when Eddie is (27 + 26) = 53.